Interview with "Former Idol" Melancholiaah
Interview conducted by Aesthel
“For our Makeup & Fashion issue we got the chance to speak with Melancholiaah and ask her a few questions! We talked about what it means to be an “Idol”, her original music and newly released EP, the viral meme status of her “Toad Sings” videos, and her cosplay and fashion! Be sure to check out Melancholiaah’s EP; 「世界の終わりで会いましょう。let’s meet at the end of the world.」wherever you stream music!”
Photo Credit: "V" of "MELANCHOLIAAH! PROJECT
CRM: Hello Melancholiaah! Could you please tell the CRM readers a bit about yourself and who you are?
Melancholiaah: Hello, my name is Melancholiaah. I am a 21 year old vocalist and original musical performance act, or “idol” act, from Houston, Texas. I began performing at conventions back in 2004 and haven’t really stopped since, but have definitely reinvented myself since. I try to emulate raw, sometimes beautiful, sometimes ugly emotion with all my performances and my music, so expect something a little unsettling but comforting from me at all times. Outside of my own J-music inspired works, I have also done vocalist work for games like Beatmania and Dance Dance Revolution.
CRM: You have described yourself as a “former idol since childhood”. What does the term idol mean to you? What do you think it means to be an idol?
Melancholiaah: I grew up looking to the Japanese idol industry as my inspiration and channeled that in everything I did. From my Hatsune Miku cosplay covers over a decade ago to joining international groups like the late “Oishii!Ichigo”, I always looked to the industry as something I wanted to aspire to be a part of. In reality, a lot of the industry is really kind of crummy and it took me a long time to really accept that. I don’t consider myself an “idol” by any means any more. Now more than ever I can be really thought to be one, which the me from childhood would be really excited to know, but now more than ever I don’t necessarily want to be considered one. The idea of it kind of traumatized me as a child and got me in some bad online situations, so now I just want to perform and sing for myself. For me, the idea of idols will forever and always be different to what the true dictionary definition of an idol is since hitting adulthood. Idols are more than just performers who sing and dance with people screaming their chants and waving their lightsticks in the audience.
For me an idol is someone who truly inspires, not only those supporting them but they inspire themselves as well. An idol is someone admirable and hardworking, someone who’s music helps those in their toughest of times. If everyone saw idols this way, I wouldn’t mind being considered one.
CRM: We love your music! Over on your YouTube channel you post both original music and covers of other songs. What are some tips that you would give for others wanting to get into producing music themselves?
Melancholiaah: Thank you so much! The biggest tips I can give is keep at it. It sounds very cliche and corny, but really. I bought my first audio mixing program at 13 and haven’t stopped since, still have a long way to go even. If you really want to do something, I encourage you to do it. Don’t do things because you don’t see yourself as the “best”, know that what you do is 100% up someone’s alley. I get a lot of questions from other performers wanting to know how to even start original music or how I get to work with the people I do, which I am so gracious to work with creators I adore so much, but the thing is you just have to reach out. It’s really that simple. Do you have a USA based Vocaloid producer you like? Contact them. A small royalty free music producer in Japan with open commissions? Contact them. A big published musician selling at Comiket this summer? Contact them. More often than not, they would love to work with you as it’s not just you benefiting, but they’re getting a paid freelance job and their name on some credits. Just reach out to those who inspire you and create magic together.
CRM: Recently you released your first EP. Congrats!! What was the process of working on this big project like? Where can CRM readers listen to the EP?
Melancholiaah: Thank you again! Oh boy though, it was tough. I was just riding off a first single I was incredibly disappointed in sound wise in December and used that disappointment to create a track which eventually became my song “final bubble bath” from my first EP, which is my absolute baby. Being an all independent act, it was really tough since most of the funding was coming out of my own pocket. I had a good bit coming in a month from Patreon and my parents, bless them, would help out whenever I was in a real bind with deadlines, but it was really stressful at times. From creating all the graphics for the CD booklet myself to editing the music videos myself to even doing some of the tracks all myself to somehow find the funds to actually print 100+ copies of the CD, it was one of the most stressful things I have ever done. I would do it again in a heartbeat though. I have never been more proud of anything in my life. My goal was to create music I would be proud to perform and I finally hit that goal. The EP can be listened to anywhere you can stream music and physical copies with bonus goodies can be bought from my online store.
CRM: Okay, we have to ask about it. Recently some of your videos kind of blew up online. How did you get started with your “Toad Sings” covers? How have the viral nature of these videos affected you and your online experience?
Melancholiaah: I knew this was a ploy to talk about Toad, haha! Honestly, I just wanted to make some funny covers for my friends and I. We often sing like Toad on long car rides just to entertain ourselves and I found I was, for whatever reason, good at doing it, so I just wanted to make covers for us to laugh at! I posted them on my Youtube because my motto for Youtube for a hot minute has been “I’m gonna do whatever I want here.” and a year or so later, it came to the surface in a truly explosive, nightmarish fashion. As fun as it is and seriously how funny some of the comments are, I do have to say it gives me a lot of anxiety! Although I am a performer, I kind of like to sit on the backburner and let whoever finds me find me and not put myself out there to be seen with the intent of wanting to be seen if that makes any sense? This is not the first viral thing to happen to me by any means, so having so many eyes on me does make me a bit nervous just because some sour taste in my mouth from the previous times. I try to remind myself it’s just fun, but now everyone expects me to do Toad all the time instead of what I’ve been doing all along aaaah! A lot of people keep saying I should just stop what I do and just do Toad stuff and to me, it’s a little disrespectful for sure as that’s just something I do when I’m bored and my music is something that really drives me as a person. Thankfully, I’m comfortable enough in myself and my music to not let it get to me too much and continue with my true passions sprinkled in with a little silliness from time to time.
Photo Credit: "V" of "MELANCHOLIAAH! PROJECT
CRM: In the past you have attended conventions like AnimeWTX and Texas Idol Fest as a guest. In your experience, what is guesting at a convention like? What are some ways that it is different than going as an attendee?
Melancholiaah: It’s very different! I have been going to conventions since 2004 and only in the past 2 years or so have I really been given these opportunities to be an official guest or performer at these events. I’ve seen both sides for sure, but I really like working as a guest. I also do staffing work at a local convention here, so I really like the business side to it and working to create a great and memorable experience for the attendees. I’ve gone from performing in hallways at conventions to now performing on main stages and am creating bonds with staff members and it’s overall much more rewarding for me this way on a personal level. It can be stressful and sometimes there’s a lot of sacrifice to be made, but overall I always want to contribute to a convention any way I can so I’m usually willing to make that sacrifice just to meet new people and contribute to making that convention a great year for the attendees, because at the end of the day it’s their experience that makes or breaks the decision of the convention being greenlit for another year or not!
CRM: Some of our favorite cosplays of yours are from Tokyo Mew Mew, Perfect Blue, Vocaloid, and Cardcaptor Sakura! What are some traits that draw you to particular characters or series that you cosplay from?
Melancholiaah: Although I don’t have opportunity to cosplay as much anymore, I have such a love for it still. When I do cosplay now a days, it’s gotta be something I really am drawn to. More recently, I have found myself wanting to do cosplays I wanted to do from childhood that I now can and can really do it to it’s fullest! I like doing characters I see myself in mostly. For example, Mima Kirigoe from Perfect Blue is one of my all time favorites cosplays and I always saw myself in her since our personal stories and journeys are so similar. Other than that, I am just an overall glutton for boys in magical girl anime so it’s my lifelong goal to do all that I can, haha! I am currently making Helios from Sailor Moon Super S and it’s always so fun to do characters like that because no one ever really does. There’s always an Ichigo but no Kisshu, always a Sakura but no Syaoran, always a Chibi Moon but no Helios. I like being the fun counterpart and running into people cosplaying my counterpart and making new friends with similar interests that way! Or maybe, truly, I am just a glutton for boys in magical girl anime and I’m just trying to justify that.
CRM: You really do it all! What are some ways that you balance your cosplay, music career, and the other work that you do?
Melancholiaah: I don’t know if I necessarily balance anything, it really feels like I’m quite all over the place all the time, haha! However, people do tell me a lot that it looks like I really have things together and I think that that’s really kind of them to say that and makes me feel really good. I think overall, it’s just that I love what I do and find such peace in it. In performing, I have met fantastic people and then we become good friends and then want to cosplay things together and meet on the weekends, so on and so forth. It’s just a big chain of good experiences and good people that make me want to keep going in all my interests. I spent a really long time dreading performing, and then a whole separate time dreading cosplay because I felt pressured to have seven new cosplays for a three day event, but it’s about realizing why you’re doing it and really loving that when it turns less of a big stressful scramble and more of a true love and passion for you that you don’t even have to worry about “balancing” like it’s one more job on top of everything else, it all just comes organically.
CRM: Outside of cosplay, we totally love your personal style! How would you define your personal fashion taste?
Photo Credit: "V" of "MELANCHOLIAAH! PROJECT
Melancholiaah: I actually go through my closet about three times every year and donate everything to change things up. I’ve dabbled in a lot of different Japanese fashions but this year has been a year of self discovery for me, so I’ve finally found a style that really makes me feel just as I am inside. I normally dress in a dying Japanese fashion called “cult party kei” and also often wear “mori kei”. Cult Party is a very comfortable style, but definitely one that turns some heads and gets some laughs. With vintage nightgowns, bed jackets, and the look of “I just slept for 5 years straight and suddenly woke up” being the make up goal for it, it definitely isn’t for everyone, but I can’t help but feel the most me in twelve layers of pastel chiffon and lace. As I mentioned, it is sadly dying out quite a bit, but I encourage anyone who spends most of their time in thrift stores or resale shops or even likes to handmake pieces look into the fashion! It’s incredibly sustainable and makes you feel like a real fairy sometimes.
CRM: Thank you for taking the time to answer our questions! Is there anything else that you would like to add? Please let our readers know where they can find more of your work online!
Melancholiaah: Thank you so much for having me, it was a blast! I recently announced my second release “LAST PARADISE” that will be coming this summer as a continuation of my first EP, so I hope you can stick around to listen to that when it comes out and really feel everything I put into it! If you’re interested in checking me out some more, I am under “Melancholiaah” everywhere on the internet and my homepage is http://melancholiaah.club/ . I want to meet everyone in the whole world and connect with song, so please let conventions know if you want to see me and together we will create a feeling never before felt.